Trying to Tame the Voices In My Head
Nostalgia is plentiful this time of year. It makes it so apparent that
even the air we breathe is fleeting.
Changing. What is there to hold onto? Hm. Perhaps nothing entirely, other than the fact that change is constant.
Ever find yourself in a moment where you realize that the moment is slipping past your fingers?
Not in a dramatic, or even super obvious way, but enough to think of yourself,
"This moment will never be again in quite the same way?"
It's a sad, but also deep realization I find myself constantly feeling to ENJOY. WHERE. I. AM.
It's so freaking hard for me.
Out here in Austin, Texas, I had a great holiday season. I kind of hid most of the time. I find that with less expectations of what it should be, I can accept what is. It was peaceful, and chilly, which makes me feel like it's really winter.
My mom came into town to visit me(she's sitting next to me now), with her dog Slash we have had for 12 years. He has been dying of cancer for the past 2.5 years, but he is still kicking, thanks to some good ol' homeopathic remedies, chemo, and apparently, a stubborn will. It breaks my heart again to know, that it won't be long til' he too disappears somewhere else, So, I'm filling him up with life while I can.
Rehearsals for the EJ tour have begun, and I am feeling excited, but a bit nervous. It's becoming 'real' now. I have a lot of imperfections to smoothen out, but today I had a bit of help.
My mom, while she has been here was been watching me perform, and giving me guidance.
It has REALLY helped getting some outside perspectives. I even posted a video of her showing me her chops here.
It just warmed my heart so much.
She's a periodontist, and is from a totally separate world than mine, but we met together to have such a precious moment I will remember forever.
What is one of your favorite memories?
I will get back to you before the end of the year so we can meet and talk about what's coming and what your thoughts are.
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I love you. Have a beautiful day! 💙