Valentines & Billboards
Hello there. Did you have a nice Valentines Day? I hope so. You deserve all the love in the world, even if it was self-love if you didn't have anyone to share it with. We played a show that night and I totally forgot to dedicate my love songs in honor of it, but. Oh well. Next time.
I'm at this cute little cafe called 'Cafe Benne' in Houston. They seem to be doing okay here in town, even though they got hit pretty hard last year.
I am just about done with week 3, and to say that it has been a bit of a whirlwind would be an understatement. Last time seemed a bit less intense. I think part of that is because I am giving a lot more of myself. A lot more energy, a lot more is on the line to go wrong.
I think putting myself in a situation with the potentiality of failing miserably if I hit a wall is exhilaratingly exhausting. In a good way.
There have been so many highlights. One, I get to meet all sorts of lovely new people. Sometimes my friends come out to see me and bring me hugs and green juice. It's the best. They make me so happy.
I get the opportunity to give my heart each and every night.
I get to travel to all sorts of different places.
I think the most intense part of this whole tour is that it gives me an aerial view of my life. Where I get picked up from my old reality, and am gently invited to look at who I am. Who I used to be. What I want out of myself, out of my life. My world.
What matters? It gave me some space(albeit more figuratively than literally.)
I can mess up during my gig. I can forget to call someone in my life. I can go down a path I accidentally really don't want to go down.
But at any point along the way, I have the choice to decide to change my attitude, and move in the right direction.
I'm so awkward. I'm shy. Sometimes I hide way more of myself than I want. It makes me frustrated.
Sometimes I close down and don't let people get close enough to me. Sometimes I am not as open as I want to be when people share their life. Sometimes I get discouraged because there's so much to learn and discover and I feel so grossly under-developed in so many ways.
Sometimes I don't know how to show people I care. I don't know what to say. I feel speechless.
Sometimes I feel so entirely misunderstood, only to realize it's me that doesn't understand me. lol
Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed, I just want to dissolve into nothingness.
But. Still. It's all a lesson to grow, and find gratitude. To remember who I am.
To remember that love is all around, constantly and I just need to tune my energy to see it.
Anyway. I could go on forever about that, and maybe I will.
Changing topics entirely -
ok! We are confident I will be charting next week on Monday. Keep your eyes peeled for the Americana, Folk, Rock and potentially blues charts. Let's see how we do!
I want to thank you again for supporting me.
I am SO dang proud of us that entirely independent music can be so potent!
Your CD's should be coming to your house soon!
I have been so overwhelmed, I had to hire a company to help me.
YOU GUYS ARE SO AWESOME.
I love you more than words can say.
My heart is soaring.
See you so soon. Please tell me how you are. I really want to know.